Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Don't Come Looking for Me


My address and phone number are unpublished. So, I was surprised to find a postcard from my high school demanding that I contact them. I was angry at being exposed--how did these people get my address? "Urgent!" was the message on the card. To be listed in an alumni directory. Does anyone still think this is a good idea? My only sense of urgency was to get myself out of that publication. I graduated 30+ years ago, and I've kept in contact with a grand total of 0 from my school, with the exception of family members, so I guess that makes 2. I kept contact with a high school friend up until a few years ago, but now I just get the occasional e-mail that also goes out to 50+ of her closest friends. I am so annoyed to have all those addresses in my Outlook Express program, just so I can know how popular this girl is. I never liked the idea of going to a reunion. Being a single person, I wanted to avoid the inappropriate questions of why I didn't have a Man, or kids. The same reasons why I avoided family weddings. I didn't want to be the one everybody felt sorry for. Even though I now have what I always called "male validation," I still don't care about high school or reunions. Now I would have to field questions about why the Man and I aren't married. I suppose I feel insecure about how my life has turned out so far. And, I left high school behind when I graduated those many years ago. I don't feel any desire to go down memory lane.
If you haven't figured it out, I guess you could call me an introvert. I need a lot of solitude to feel comfortable. The only exceptions are the Man and Piccolo. I really feel a void when they're not here, even though lots of times I want the Man to be sound asleep in the next room. I don't always feel comfortable in social situations. I guess I'm a lot like Piccolo. I mostly want to move about with some discretion and privacy. I think if I have too much people contact, I pretty much can melt down, which is one of the reasons why I'm steering clear of certain Tuesday meetings. I won't elaborate on the other reasons. My being introverted is probably why I'm usually cranky after a show.
That being said, I realize that I have very few real girl friends. So, I'm looking forward to meeting a lovely knitting friend for lunch this weekend.
The photo is from the pet blessing in Madrid. I think it sums up my feelings about being exposed.

1 comment:

Laura said...

I feel pretty much the same about high school. I didn't care for it the first time around--I certainly don't need a reunion. And I haven't spoken to anyone I graduated with since graduation night--what would we possibly have to talk about? They keep calling my mom's house, though, but she has been trained now to never give out my info.